Maybe Our Problem Isn’t Guns, After All
Maybe It’s the Human Male
This article is not a “pick on men” piece. I have a son and a husband that mean the world to me.
There are plenty of men who know how to manage their anger. They manage to navigate the challenges of life by relying on an array of problem-solving skills. I’m not preaching to those men this morning. Although I do believe that it’s time for you guys to step up to the plate and help the world address the unrelenting problem of violence in our societies.
Because we’re in deep trouble.
Violence is an age-old problem. It’s been destroying the world for centuries. We keep asking why? That’s question that needs an answer. The only way to solve our overwhelming problem with violence is to find the root cause and then figure out how to address it.
It’s that simple and that hard.
Each morning, as I process the daily news which consists of a generous portion of violence and murder, I feel frustrated and helpless. We may be living in the most technologically advanced era in the history of humankind, but socially we’ve made little progress.
We’re cavemen with cell phones.
I invented that little saying a few years ago and use it often. At the time, I meant cave people not specifically males. I was keenly aware that the gap between our social and technological evolution was growing by the day. Like most mothers, I want a safer world for my children. After all, I insisted on bringing them into this mess. If one of their biggest threats in life is their own species, what does that tell me about the gift of life?
This morning, I use the word cavemen to mean MEN. It’s hard to argue with the data.
Men are responsible for the lion’s share of murders. They’ve been on a killing spree for centuries. War, murder, and rape is their personal domain. Although I’m in favor of sensible gun laws, it’s not the guns that do the killing. Yeah, I just said that.
It’s the person holding the gun and that person is almost always — a man.
What the hell is the matter with men? You’re holding the world hostage. No one can move freely because we never know when or if we’ll be in the right place at the wrong time and die by a stray bullet.
Mass shootings are almost entirely the handiwork of men.
Yet women are accused of being the emotional ones. Why is no one addressing this issue? Why do we keep pretending that we all share in this horrendous social ill when we don’t. Not even close. I have a sneaky feeling that if it was a string of women creating bloody havoc, the world would put its foot down.
But mass shootings are only a tiny piece of the problem.
In fact, most murders are not mass shootings. Men are killed by other men for other reasons all the time. More men are killed every year than women by a long shot. (No pun intended) It’s how they solve disagreements, betrayals, marital issues, getting fired, and almost any problem that confronts human beings.
Their problem-solving skill set is very, very limited.
Recently, I read two different articles. One was about a man who stabbed his girlfriend 50 times. The other was about a man who shoplifted a machete from a Walmart store, hid it until he got outside, and then stabbed a Walmart employee with it. Both took place in my state.
I wouldn’t be surprised if there are men in every state who will kill someone this week.
Granted, the man with the machete didn’t kill the employee. The gun lovers, mostly males, were ecstatically responding to the story on social media. See? It’s not just guns. Criminals will use anything to commit murder, even a machete.
Agreed. I’ll give you that, you gun loving fools, but only if you change one word.
MEN not criminals will use anything to commit murder.
I want to know why? I want to know why there isn’t a massive campaign sweeping this country specifically geared to address this predominately male behavior that’s robbing me and my loved ones of our freedom to be safe when we go to Walmart.
Oh, and don’t get me started on war.
Men have been glorified for going to war since the beginning of time. Men start wars, fight wars, and benefit from wars. There’s always another war to fight in an endless stream of violence. Always. Women have the babies and then men kill them after they grow up. Yet, abortion is the big political issue. Women are shamed and blamed by society while men slaughter walking, talking, breathing, feeling, wide-awake, and fully developed human beings on a daily basis. Men aren’t blamed, however.
Criminals are blamed, implying that the criminals are all of us.
The data doesn’t lie. The daily news is a constant reminder. We are not safe at a festival, in a parade, or going to work because of men. My child is not safe at school because of men. I’m not safe on a dark street because of men. Our sons die on the battlefield because of men. Women give life and men destroy life.
Now don’t get me wrong, women are far from perfect.
When it comes to shoplifting, men and women are equal. They both fall prey to sticky fingers. Women can be very abusive, too. So within marriages, women are often verbally, emotionally, even physically abusive. It’s underreported. Women can be mean and on occasion women kill people, just not nearly as often as men. A woman almost never grabs her gun, walks into a church full of strangers, and shoots anyone in sight.
I’m sure there are lots of social, psychological, and cultural reasons why men are the major perpetrators of violent crimes.
For all I know there could be biological reasons as well. Whatever the reasons, it’s time to address the problem. A society should not be held hostage by the constant threat of violence.
Men love to think of themselves as the hero.
They take great pride in fighting for their country and protecting their families, but they’ve failed miserably. We are not safe because you’re guarding the door. We’re in constant danger.
And guess what? You’re the problem, guys.
If you won’t do something about it, then maybe women need to step up to the plate and demand that you put down your guns, knives, machetes, spears, and weapons of mass destruction once and for all. You’re NOT keeping us safe. We’re huddling in our homes, behind our desks, in our locked cars. We’re worried about what YOU might do to us. Even worse, we’re terrified about what YOU might do to our children. We went to the trouble to bring them into this world, raise them, feed them, love them and then YOU kill them. We’ve been taught since we were little girls to be afraid of you.
You are the root cause. It’s time for society to deal with this ongoing threat.
We need massive campaigns, political movements, lots of education, and a redefining of social roles. We need to create a culture that supports creative problem solving, diversity, and non-violence. We’re not cave people any longer. We have modern medicine, computers, airplanes, phones, and quickly evolving scientific information. We better understand the human brain and the psychology of what makes us do what we do. We need to focus on developing a host of conflict resolution skills as we take violence off our list of choices. There are hundreds of ways to solve problems.
It’s time for societies to evolve to the next level. Only then will the gift of life have true meaning.
So many Americans, including men, are hoping to go to heaven. I think I know why. Heaven is supposed to be a safe haven at last. That tells me that people already know what societies should look like. We’ve just decided to postpone the GOOD life until the NEXT life.
Why not do it now for the sake of our children?
Let’s address the root cause. What is making men resort to violence over and over again? Let’s change the social narrative and the cultural expectations for what it means to be a human being. Otherwise, I don’t see the point in continuing to bring children into a world that glorifies violence and refuses to evolve to the next level. I want a Star Trek world. I want heaven on earth.
I’m not remotely interested in the next life.
We haven’t figured out how to live this life yet. I want to know that if and when a woman and man decide to give birth that it won’t turn out to be a big mistake, a heartbreaking string of events that ends with suffering caused by men killing their own kind. We’ll need everybody’s help, however.
It won’t be easy to change centuries and centuries of cavemen into highly evolved creatures.
Teresa is a retired educator, author, world traveler, and professional myth buster. You can find her books on Amazon.
